How To Love


I had a very interesting conversation with a coworker of mine some time back about Love.  He said that he would not get married to someone because he loves her.  He would get married because it makes sense.  I couldn’t understand this stance and we continued the conversation which somehow ended up with him asking me this question:

“If you love someone, and the person loves you but not the way you want to be loved, would you continue to be with that person?”

I thought it to be an interesting question and told him I’d get back to him, and due to my busy schedule, I’m only just now getting a chance to think about it.

What does this mean?   It could be interpreted to mean are you willing to settle for someone’s way of loving you?  Or, it doesn’t matter how the person loves you back as long as they do?

It’s human nature to want to have things our own way.  It is also human nature to expect others around us to be the way we want them to be.  In an ideal world, that may be ok, but in the real world, we have to accept that the world actually doesn’t revolve around us as individuals and that we’ll have to compromise in one forum or the other.

For me, I know I could accept and be with someone who doesn’t love me the way I want, as long as I know that the person loves me and shows me in his own way that he does.  Di bag a lip service nah go work.  No telling me you love me now and then doing some shit you know is to the contrary.  This leads me to another question.  What is you are not loving your significant other the way he/she wants you to or the way you should as dictated by society.  What happens then?  Would we be open to criticism, recommendations, open to adjusting our behaviour to please the one we love?

I believe in Love.  I’m addicted to it, and if I love someone, I’ll do everything in my power to please them in every way possible without compromising my values or my individuality.  As long as I’m being who I am, that gives me enough pleasure.

All we need is love right?  What yu tink???


4 responses »

  1. that guy certainly drop and lick him head back fi chat that foolishness!

    Relationships are about compromise and if you truly love someone you will compromise. On the other hand if the person truly loves you then he/she would not want you to compromise to the point where it makes you unhappy.

  2. What happens when the person who you with claims that they love you but acts to the contrary? You know deep down with gut feelings that their actions is suggesting something else. How is it possible to maintain a relationship when your partner goes out her way to conceal or obfuscate certain actions? When you are with someone and another person starts talking then in affectionate terms as ‘edible girl’ or ‘sexy academic’ shit you know the gig is up regardless of whatever she says!

  3. practically you want someone who doesn’t try to kill you. Using the term “love” is merely a way of complicating something rather simple.

    its evident in your gibberish: “For me, I know I could accept and be with someone who doesn’t love me the way I want, as long as I know that the person loves me and shows me in his own way that he does”

    you said “could”, “accept”, “doesn’t love me”, “as long as”, “I know that”, “in his own way”, “that he does”.

    What the guy is saying is that it doesn’t matter how much “love” there is but how in fact how “real” it is.

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